Fairy Tales...Really?

Books lie scattered. A glass of water teeters on the edges of The Maximum City that lies close by waiting to be read. I pace. I sit back to write. Everything is hazy except the space filled with words. Words arranged a certain way, words that want to say specific things but I don't seem to get the arrangement right. Voices of people jostle for space in my head.

Today words seem wild, unmanageable. Theres this vehement need to restrain them and I love this feeling. This absorption of the body, mind and soul while creating - the restlessness outside and the stillness deep inside me.

Snow White, Sleeping Beauty and of course not to forget Cinderella - I believed in those fairy tales. They promise us a world that is not! As we grow up and get into the real world, we have our innocence kicked out of us everyday. In my case, what little was left, I was holding onto it for dear life But Alas! Now No More....

Experiences of people around me has started troubling me. Can you love and hate someone at the same time? Can you wish someone out of your life, while knowing you'd be the first one to miss them if they were gone? Why does life take such sudden turns and Why are you stranded at such a crossroad all alone?

Don't you sometimes wish that people could read your mind? That you didn't have to say, they just knew? That you didn't always have to ask, they would just say what you wanted to hear. I've been feeling like that for the last few days. And then I realized how futile it is and It's just hard to snap out of it.

STILL, I can't shake those tales off. Damn them! Everything I've seen in the movies, sung or swooned over in books is turning out to be baloney. My romance with life seems to have come to an end and I feel like somehow I am supposed to realise it and shake it off…But something inside me just doesnt let me... just tells me that it'll fly by. And my smile might just reach my eyes again.

I think I just want what everyone wants, something real, that I can't corrupt with my pessimism. And I want to share these moments with somebody and have them feel it too. But where's my joy? Right now somewhere faraway…. I Guess! :-(